Monday, August 18, 2014

Scared of the future..

Many of you know I've been struggling with the question what should my future look like? I have been asking myself this question for what feels like the last 3-4 years.  Each year I get excited about my future and the new life I could possibility have BUT I do absolutely nothing to change. I have been wanting to sell my condo, leave Ohio and get into a new career path for years but my fear of failing has paralyzed me.

It upsets me when I think of all the time I have lost because of this fear that I hold deep within me.  I'm scared none of my plans for the future will work out and I'll be lonely with no real career for the rest of my life.  I studied my ass off in college to get to where I am today.... yet, I can't find joy or feel successful in my current place.  The real question I been trying to answer is....How do you walk away from something you worked so hard for?  I feel like I would be throwing away 9 years of college if I changed my career path now but those 9 years of college could certainly put me in a career I would flourish in. 

This year will be full of discovering what, where and who I should be.  I can promise you that this is the year I will be taking a leap of faith into a future that I deserve...taking control of my own life sort of speak.  I can't stop thinking about all the things I could do with my life, the places I could move and the people I will meet.  It's freaking exciting but completely scary at the same time. My hope is that while I try to find this new path, I also find a stronger person that will take the risk, run towards fear and will only listen to the voice within myself.

How do I find this new path? That is still a question I can't answer :( I plan on doing a lot of soul searching, trying things that scare the shit out of me and a lot of praying to the big man up stairs to lead me to the correct door.  I believe that doors have closed in my life to lead me to bigger and better things. I have that "will not quit" attitude, the drive to be successful and will work my ass off till I'm extremely happy.

Life sometimes sucks but those moments often lead you to better things.  If you hate your job, your boyfriend, your body, the state you live in, your house, the way you act...etc Do something about it! Don't settle in a life you hate.  Big dreams can come true once you take the steps towards making them a reality.  I know it can be SCARY but how exciting is it knowing that you have the power to change your crappy life to one you been wishing for.  It starts with you...It starts today!

Promise me that you will stop settling and start doing things that scare you.  The things that scare you make you stronger, wiser and who knows you may find a new life you been wishing for. My hope is that my journey will inspire others to listen to that voice within that has been whispering for a long time.  That voice is important because that voice is YOU.  Don't shut it out or shut it up.

What is one thing that you want to do but have been to scared to try it?




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